Monthly Archives: January 2010

January 26, 2010

How To Make A Marriage Work – Part 2

By alexpenduck

This week I am blogging about five ways you can make a marriage work. Today is part two of this five-part post. You can read yesterday’s post here, Part 1. Let me just say that things such as love are a given! If there isn’t love then it’s obvious your marriage is not going to be as it should, but that is for a different post at a different time.

So here is part two:

2. God Has To Be First!

For some of you, you may say, ‘well that’s obvious!’. If you are saying that, I’d reply by saying, ‘yes it is, and no it isn’t’.

For someone who does not have a ‘relationship’ with God, the thought of putting God first is a little weird! For most Christians though they actually think they are putting God first, when in all truth, they are not.

Just think about some of the conversations that married couples have with each other.

  • How shall we spend our pay check?
  • How shall we teach, educate and bring up our kids?
  • What kind of house shall we live in?
  • Which set of parents shall we go to at Christmas?
  • What shall we eat tonight?
  • Should I take that promotion at work?

The list could go on and on. I have one question for you though. In those questions above do you put God first in all of them? If we and in we I include myself we would have to say no. I don’t ask God what I should eat tonight. Yet God promises that when we put him first in everything we do he will bless and take care of the rest. Matthew 6:33 tells us to seek to put first the Kingdom of God and live a righteous life, then everything else in your will fall into place.

Too often we say we put God first because we go to church, we volunteer in the nursery at Church, we give tithes, we even may have family devotions at home. However, is God really first in your life and your marriage? Is there a sense of God’s presence in your home? When you argue, do you seek forgiveness and reconciliation over getting your own way? Do you make your decision or hear God’s opinions? Husbands do you love your wife as Christ loves the church? (In all honesty that is some tough task no matter how incredible our wives maybe). Wives do you really see your husband as a leader?

These are just some of the multitude of questions we should ask ourselves concerning if we put God first in your marriage.

When you do, you will be able to overcome anything. You will see what a beautiful thing a healthy marriage can be. So who you seeking first?

3 comments   |  tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | posted in Marriage

January 25, 2010

How To Make A Marriage Work – Part 1

By alexpenduck

Recently I have seen so many people go through problems with their marriage. Most people dream of a happy marriage where they can grow old with the love of their lives. However, the reality is that for many the hopes and dreams of yesterday have turned into a nightmare.

As I have talked with those who are going through problems in their marriage it seems like the same problems occur time and again. There are many different outcomes, situations and problems, but the root cause always seems to be the same. So, this week I am going to blog about 5 ways you can keep a healthy strong vibrant marriage, and no, date night is not one of them!

For those who do not believe in the institution of marriage, these are not for you, but I must say you are missing out on the best thing you could ever experience. So here’s my first step to a great marriage:

  1. Believe in your spouse more than your spouse believes in their own self

Far too many people do not strive to achieve their dreams and aspirations because there is no-one to cheer us on. How many times have you heard someone make fun of their spouse when their spouse talks about their dreams in life. One wife might say, ‘I want to go back to school and become a fashion designer’, in response the husband may say, ‘no dear, that’s some far-fetched dream, the fashion industry is too competitive and your not a spring chicken anymore’. Really what the husband is saying is that he does not believe the wife has what is takes to make it in the fashion industry. How sad that the person who should be your biggest supporter is the one knocking you down.

Yes, there is always that element of reality and you must speak the truth, but far too often couples do not believe their spouse can really attain anymore than the place they are at in the present.

I believe I have a great marriage. This one of the things I see which we have that others who struggle don’t. We’re not perfect, but I have to honestly say that Raquel believes in me more than I believe in me. She sees things in me that I don’t even see. The feeling is mutual. If only she could see what I see in her. If she wanted to make a rocket to fly to the moon, I’d back her 100% because I know she could do it if she put her mind to it!

So today, ask yourself this one question, ‘Do I believe in my spouse more than they believe in their own self?‘ If the answer is no, start seeing what God sees in your spouse. An incredible person with the perfect personality and talents to accomplish what no-one else on this earth could accomplish, their God-given destiny!

4 comments   |  tags: , , , , , , , , | posted in Marriage

January 22, 2010

I’ll Never Buy A Mac!

By alexpenduck

So I have decided I will never buy a Mac over a PC!

What you may say? Are you crazy? Macs are the best! Anyone who’s worth anything gets a Mac! You don’t really appreciate technology unless you own a Mac!

Yeah, yeah, heard it all before. However, the reason I will never buy a Mac is not because they aren’t great computers, nor is it because they don’t have the best technology because they really do. The reason I will never buy a Mac is because of their attitude! I hate their commercials and I really dislike their constant ‘putting down’ of PC. Not that I’m a PC lover either, but it is just a matter of principle.

Why is it that a company like Mac focuses all of their advertising budget on another company? You know the commercials. The one where Mac is represented by the skinny cool guy and PC is represented by the over weight average middle-aged guy. If Mac was so good, why wouldn’t they tell us about how great their own product was? Why wouldn’t they tell us how much our lives would be better if we had a Mac? No, instead they spend millions of dollars bad mouthing their competitors.

For the same reason I will never buy a Verizon phone! I will never support Liverpool FC (that’s for all my British friends) and I will never vote for a political candidate that spreads negativity about their opponent.

I realize this is what business is all about. Knocking out your opponent so you can have an open road to consumer heaven, but I just don’t like it.

Maybe this is the same reason so many people have such a distaste for the church! Instead of spreading the word that through Christianity there is life, hope and destiny. We have spread the negativity of other Christians. Looked down on other churches and told people how much better so-called ‘Christians’ are than everyone else. If I was a spiritual consumer I wouldn’t want that, in fact it would actually put me off.

The Apostle Paul warned against this kind of thinking in Romans 12:3 when he said, “Don’t think you are better than you really are. Be honest in your evaluation of yourselves, measuring yourselves by the faith God has given us.”

Paul warned us that we are not better than anyone else, but we are just sinners saved by Grace. I’m a sinner, you’re a sinner! I’m just thankful for Grace.

So maybe one day I’ll buy a Mac, but their philosophy of marketing has to change. Maybe one day the true church will stand up and be completely transparent and recognize we are no better than anyone else, just blessed that we have experienced God’s Grace. Then, just maybe will we start to be effective in showing this world the life, hope and destiny there is through faith in Jesus Christ.

4 comments   |  tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , | posted in Christianity, Church, Life in general

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