This week I am blogging about five ways you can make a marriage work. Today is part-four of this five-part post. You can read Part 1;  Part 2 & Part 3 here.

So here’s part-four:

4. Actually Have A Conversation With Each Other

Before I got married I use to look at those couples in a restaurant who never said a word to each other and think how sad! I vowed I’d never do that! If I’m eating dinner with the women of my dreams, aka my wife, I would never just eat and not say anything!

Well, I must admit it was a vow I broke. We have been that couple on several occasions. It wasn’t that we didn’t have anything to say, it was just that the conversation sometimes got boring! Now before you think I have just offended my wife, let me explain. We dated long distance for 15 months. I was in England, Raquel in Missouri. We talked everyday for over an hour. We talked about everything, from likes and dislikes, to dreams and passions, to friends and family, we even answered questions a few times out of a book about relationships. When we got married we lived, worked and breathed together. Most of our conversation became about work (it was our life!). One day I realized when I got bored talking about work, I had nothing else to talk about. The days of long romantic conversations had turned into talking about work and church ministry.

The last nine months have been fantastic for our conversation life. We no longer work at the same place (we makes me sad some days), so long talks about work are off the agenda. We have now rediscovered real conversations once again and my love for my wife has grown beyond control in the process!

As I look around at many married couples, they have lost the art of conversation. They now talk about their kids, or their family or their finances, but they rarely delve into one of those meaningful conversations that stimulates their mind and their marriage. This past summer we spent most nights sitting on our deck with the TV off, the birds singing and the mosquitos biting. The conversation would flow and we felt we could sit there for hours.

So those times at dinner where we have nothing to say to each other I pray are a thing of the past. God created to converse. Converse with him and to converse with others. For a marriage to work you must stimulate meaningful conversations, not arguments, not brief exchanges about the kids, but real deep conversations. Trust me it will revolutionize your marriage.

So what you going to talk about over dinner tonight?